Thursday, 12 May 2016

Autumn And Winter With Rowena - Chapter 2 . Bath-Day

Dear Diary,

The storm has passed. Now, days afterwards, another thing worth writing about has occurred here in My Kingdom.
It was a sunny and warm Friday afternoon, when our Human Girl began to fill the two tall cooler boxes that stood uselessly in the yard.
Protea clicked her beak. "Oh, my dears, I don't think that's a good thing... Unless she's only filling them to wash our feed-dishes..."
I doubted it. Our feed dishes were reasonably clean at the moment. "I hope..." I began, but I did not finish my sentence, because Protea shot me a look that meant don't frighten Strelitzia! ... and of course Her Perfectness must be minded... That bossy hen! Who's the princess? Me! ME!
But I kept my beak shut and watched Human Girl filled the tall cooler boxes.
Our fear was soon confirmed. "Oh no! She's added three jugs of hot water to them! She never does that much for washing feed-dishes!" squawked Protea.
Strelitzia shuddered. "I h-hate baths!" she said. "I w-won't go!"  
Streli could be very stubborn. But she didn't get her own way always. Human Girl would catch her and wash her in that dreaded tub, no matter what Stubborn Strelitzia did to escape.
I gulped. "Who's going first?"
"Oh, make the best of it!" smiled Protea. "At least we'll have lovely clean, smooth feathers!"
I hardly heard her. I was staring in horror at what our Human was doing.
"Oh... I don't believe it!" I yelped. "Aaarrgghh! Sh-she's adding lavender to the bathwater!"
My sisters looked, and sure enough, our human was added the pale purple lavender flowers, straight from the bush, into the water! The water that I was going to be dunked in!
"Oh how lovely!" Strelitzia was saying. "Won't we smell nice, sis?"
Protea nodded approvingly. "It's going to be much better, smelling of flowers instead of sand and rocks."
"What!? Have you two lost your minds?!" I groaned in disbelief. "You want to be washed in that poisonous mixture?"
Protea said, "Ahem! It is a good thing to be clean. See here, just lift up your feathers. Now, look! the skin is all sandy and black! It will be clean and comfortable after a nice, sweet-smelling bath."
That's true. But I still dread water. It's horrible. Even warm, soapy water with Epsom salts in it. 
I looked around the run desperately. "Quick! I command you to help me find a place to hide!"
The girls had to obey. They told me to crouch in the old compost hole. I was well out of sight. I began to feel rather hopeful.
Human Girl usually did things in the Pecking Order order. I'm at the top of it and Strelitzia's at the bottom. Which means Protea always goes second. But! there is two ways to do it still: top to bottom OR bottom to top.
It's usually top to bottom. Bad luck for me!
But I had a small hope that she might go bottom to top for once.
But alas! No sooner had she filled the last tub, than she headed for the run, and ignoring Strelitzia, found me!
I flapped and scratched desperately trying to free myself, but humans are strong and I was held firmly.
She brought me to the blue tub, which held soapy water. The other tub (green) held hotter water with no soap for rinsing.
Human dipped my feet in. I winced. 
"Is it too hot, my pet?" she asked.
She felt it with her wrist. "Oh, no, it's fine." she assured me.
Then I was dunked in whole. I flapped and tried to leap out of the tub, but Human Girl caught me and smoothed my feathers soothingly.
"It's OK," she crooned.
I do not like getting wet. And I certainly don't like being soaked. But that's what Human Girl did.
She soaked me until the water had reached my skin, and then began to rub me softly, careful not to pull out my feathers.
She occasionally used some soap, but it was mostly soaking. 
Then she bathed Protea. Protea rather liked it, and so did Strelitzia but I was too busy being wet and miserable to pay to much attention to their reactions to water.
After the baths, we sat in the run drying off and smoothing our feathers, basking in the hot sun.
Later, when we were mostly dry, our Human Girl brought us some supper; it was a very special treat she had made, as a peace-offering.
It was some nice watermelon ice-lollies, and you can find the simple recipe here! On my fabulous Instagram.
Now, that we were 99.9% dry, we headed into the Haunted Henhouse to sleep.
"Well," I said to my sisters/handmaidens as we climbed onto the roomy roost. "I'm sure glad that's over!"



Friday, 29 April 2016

Autumn And Winter With Rowena - Chapter 1 . The Storm

Dear Diary,

It is an unusually cold day in My Kingdom today.... I have nothing to do except take selfies to post on my fabulous Instagram.
Oh, yes and write in this diary... You know, dear diary, I don't really like keeping a diary where you're only supposed to write true things... So don't be surprised if I write things that are not 100% true... But I'll keep all my 'lies' as close to the truth as possible.
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(this part is written one day after the text above, early in the morning before light)
So, I'm sitting in the dark, spooky nesting box of the Haunted Henhouse, typing on my mini-laptop.
I didn't write since yesterday morning, but nothing interesting has happened during that day, except some heavy rain and having a warm layers' pallets mash lunch and supper.
Well, here's the story of last evening:
As it began to get dark, my sisters and I took our grit, which was slightly soggy from the rain, and headed to the coop.
Suddenly, we heard the humans' back door open, and the mother human stepped out.
She boarded up the windows of the Haunted Henhouse (which were more like doors to us) with a yellow cloth-like thing, and some board and bricks.
Then she disappeared back into the Human House.
"Th-that was... Odd." said Strelitzia, shivering in the icy cold air.
I nodded. Protea said briskly, "Come on, Your Majesty, it is getting dark."
We all got up onto the rickety roost, but we were barely upon it, when the door opened again, and this time the our girl came out.
The hurried over to us, wrenching away the wire fence and not even bothering to close it is again.
"Yikes," I whispered. "What's going on?"
"I-I dunno," said Strelitzia. "Sh-she hasn't got any treats..."
Then she squealed, "Oh, Princess, l-look out!"
I found myself being lifted from behind. Human Girl was trying to move us!
I kicked and slapped her hands with my wings. She dropped me for a moment to rub her hands, and then she lunged at me again and this time she caught me tightly.
I squawked indignantly. Human Girl carried me out of the run, towards the back door of the Haunted Henhouse; she could not simply slip me through the window/door, cos it had been boarded up.
I tried to scratch her, but I didn't succeed. She entered the spooky building and laid me like a little chick onto the 'roost'... 
"I'll bring ickle Wenie-Claw her friends, shall I?" she cooed as she left.
I bristled angrily, and settled myself as comfortably as I could.
After a few seconds, she returned carrying a ruffled Lady Protea. She gave me a cold look. "I want to sit there," she said icily as she was set down beside me.
"No way!" I told her.
Soon, Strelitzia was there too. We were all pretty much settled for the night.
Human Girl placed some cold water and cereal with yogurt on the floor near the door.
"Night-night!" she said to us.
Then she shut the door and left.
It poured during the night, and the wind blew horribly hard, but it was fairly warm in the Haunted Henhouse.
Finally, morning came and we hopped down to have some food and water.
We drank much, but the cereal and yogurt we just nibbled.
After we had eaten we waited for our Human Girl to let us out.
She came after a while, and let us free range her garden a bit, out of the run.
I desperately wanted to lay an egg; so did Streli. But we wanted to use my Broody Corner.
I hurried over to it. "It's my Broody Corner, I get to go first!" I called to her.
"B-but I'm younger!" she shouted stubbornly.
I reached the leaf-covered corner. "Ha!" I screeched in triumph. "I got here first!"
But as I peeked inside, I gasped in horror. My whole cozy little nest was soaking wet!
I screamed for Human Girl. She hurried out at my call.
"What is it, Princess?" she asked.
"NO! Noooo! My nest! Look at my nest!" I howled.
"Calm down, Rowena," my human snapped. "Wait here."
She went into our coop, and gathered some dry grass from the nest. Then she went into the Haunted Henhouse and took some dry grass from that nest, too.
She returned to My Broody Corner with a good amount of warm, dry grass.
She laid it over the wet leaves at the bottom of my nest. I crept in and tested it. It was lovely!
I gave my human a quick look that meant 'thank you' and began to lay my egg.
It came out after about 4 minutes, with Strelitzia hopping up and down with impatience by the entrance. What a beauty it was! I nudged it carefully into a soft spot and let Streli in.
"B-bok," she grumbled. "W-what took you s-so long?"
I ignored her. 
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.
.
The rest of the day was pretty much OK. We ate a hot lunch and supper and we were put back into the Haunted Henhouse for the night. "It's a terrible storm, girls," our human informed us as she put us up. "You must stay here. It's warmer than your Summer Coop."
So we will probably stay in the Haunted Henhouse for the rest of winter... Or forever, perhaps.
Anyway, it's really time I stopped typing; it's nearly morning and Human Girl will let us out any time now.
- Princess Rowena of Rowena's Kingdom

Wednesday, 27 April 2016

Autumn And Winter With Rowena

Late Autumn is upon the sleepy land of Rowena's Kingdom...
The leader of this little country, Princess Rowena, has just had a thought.
The thought is, when last did she write in her diary?
The princess hops off her high wall, and quietly enters the Haunted Henhouse.
The henhouse is mostly shadowy, but she can see clearly by the golden blade of sunlight which streams in through the window.
The henhouse is comfortable, and not really haunted at all. There is a mirror and one end of the room, and a spacious nesting box at the other.
Rowena jumps into the nesting box and finds her diary; it is an old, dusty book and she can't find the pen anywhere.
On the inside, her writing is smudgy and hardly readable. She clicks her beak and decides it is not good for writing in anymore.
But then she has an excellent idea!
Her human spoils her rotten, and would surely lend Rowena a laptop!
Chuckling in satisfaction, the little red princess goes back to perch comfortably on her wall-throne.
Later, at lunchtime when the human girl came down to feed them, Rowena tipped the water-bowl over, so her human had to stay a little longer to refill it.
This gave Princess Rowena a chance to talk to her. She said, "Bok bok? Karrrk."
"Yes, my little cherryflutters?" her human replied. 
"Don't call me that!" Rowena bristled. "And I would like to borrow a laptop... Please?"
"Oh, of course you may, Wena! You are so cute... What will you use it for?"
Princess Rowena cleaned her toe-talons carefully. "None of your business." she said in polite, sugary voice.
Rowena found herself being hugged, and later that afternoon, she was sitting in the nesting box with a large laptop before her.
Actually, her human had given her the smallest laptop she had in the house, but it was almost at big as Rowena, and much, much heavier than her.
Rowena thought to herself, "The world needs to know more about fabulous me... Don't you think so?" she asked of a small sparrow who was sitting in the window. 
The sparrow cocked his head cheekily at her and chirruped something very rude.
"Oh, buzz off!" Her Majesty said to him with an icy glare. He did. 
Suddenly, two pretty heads popped up in the window where the unruly sparrow had just been.
"Hullo, Wena," said Strelitzia. "What is it?"
Princess Rowena clicked on her Blogger dashboard with her talon. "Nothing. It's only that stupid little sparrow, Bullet."
Protea approached the princess. "Blogging?" she asked gently.
Rowena nodded. "I'm trying to start a new diary, in fact!"
"That's nice, dear," said Protea. 
"But, look here, I need some help from you two."

After some teamwork and advice and other blogging stuff like, choosing the font, the title, etc, this piece of writing is completed! Chapter one of Autumn And Winter With Rowena will be published on this blog soon!
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Written by Helen Cryestira Viorel.

Tuesday, 1 March 2016

Those Crazy Chickens! Book One: Monday Chapter 8

The Case Of The Missing Muffins
A mystery story that involves a chickens' favourite thing: FOOD!!!



It's a normal Monday morning in Rowena's Kingdom... Protea is getting some breakfast for her two sisters... When she makes a shocking discovery!...


Protea: "What--!? Wait, where are the pumpkin muffins?!"

Strelitzia: "No way... You have NOT lost the pumpkin muffins, have you, Pro?!"

Protea: "Streli, I did not say anything about loosing the muffins. I brought them home from Baking Class yesterday, put them here, RIGHT HERE, in the cupboard, and now it's NOT THERE!"

Strelitzia: (groans) "Oh, no... This whole day is ruined! I need my breakfast! I need my muffins NOW!"

Rowena: (tragically) "O, what could have happened to them?"

Protea: (eyeing Rowena suspiciously) "Ro... You didn't eat them, did you?"

Rowena: "What?! No."

Strelitzia: "Are you sure?"

Rowena: "Quite sure. I mean, how can I not know if I've eaten something?"

Strelitzia: "Well, you could've gotten up at 1 or 2 in the morning, opened the cupboard and eaten them all, gone back to bed and forgotten it all by the morning?"

Rowena: "Well, I haven't!"

Protea: (still looking at Rowena) "Hmm..."

Rowena: (hopefully) "Maybe we can report it to the Police Chooks?"

Protea: (nodding) "Hm, yes, as it is a rather serious case."

Strelitzia: "Ok, let's go. Quickly, girls!"

Later, at the police station, Protea is talking to a large, mean-looking, hawk-eyed hen at the desk...

Protea: "... so, you see, Miss Oceonia, it's very important that we track down the the thief who took our breakfast! It's very serious..."

Miss Oceonia: (nodding gravely) "Yes, I see... I will send Horace and Coldclaw to look into this..."

Two large and scary-looking roosters, with red eyes, walk into the room.

Coldclaw: "I am a detective, Miss Snow... I will have your thief before tomorrow..."

Protea: "Thank you! Is there anything I can do, Miss Oceonia?"

Miss Oceonia: "You can give Coldclaw and Horace all the info and facts. Thank you, Miss Snow, I wish you good luck with this case."

Later, at the scene of the theft.. (the kitchen)...

Horace: "Hmm... How many muffins were there in the cupboard, Miss Snow?"

Protea: "Six. Two for each of us."

Coldclaw: "Miss Ravenclaw, do you have anything to say on the subject?"

Rowena: "I suspect it was... Brownie Piper, that awful sparrow!"

Coldclaw: (frowning) "What proof do you have to show it was him?"

Rowena: "He's always dropping in... And I saw crumbs by the Pipers' house."

Horace: "We will see the crumbs... He may possibly be the thief in this case."

After a short walk to the Piper House (a nest in a pipe)...

Rowena: (points to crumbs beneath the pipe) "There! Orange crumbs! He's the thief!"

Coldclaw: "Brownie Piper! Come out of your dwelling!"

Brownie: "What d'you want?"

Horace: "Did you rob these young ladies? Did you steal their pumpkin muffins?"

Brownie: "No! Didn't do sucha thing!"

Horace: "Miss Ravenclaw has good proof against you, sir."

Brownie: (angrily) "Well, Miss Ravenclaw is a meanie, and I'll tell you somethin', Mister! She stole the muffins, and put them crumbs 'ere by my home! She's the one to blame! Now, GET OUTTA HERE!!!" (chases them away, pecking and screeching)

Much later...

Rowena: "Okay, okay, I did it, Protea! Now, are you gonna arrest me or what?"

Horace: "No, Miss Ravenclaw, you are going to Protea's Baking Class with her for a month as punishment."

Rowena: (howling) "No! I HATE baking!! I'm not going!!"

Protea: (angrily) "Oh yes you are, Rowena! No complaints, or you will go for TWO months! Now, get ready, we're going for your first lesson RIGHT NOW."

Rowena: (groans) "Not even six pumpkin muffins are worth Baking Class for a month..."

End of chapter eight.

And end of Those Crazy Chickens! Book One: Monday !


Dear Reader, I hope you enjoyed this book! I will work on Those Crazy Chickens! Book Two: Tuesday , as well as many other stories! Sorry if you find any spelling mistakes. Thank you for reading.

~ Helen Cryestira Viorel






Thursday, 14 January 2016

Those Crazy Chickens! Book One: Monday Chapter 7

Just Another Load Of Nonsense

If you like talking and listening to nonsense, you'll like this chapter of Those Crazy Chickens! a lot.



*The three chickens are sitting at home. Rowena is glued to the new TV. Protea is writing poetry in her diary with her new gold pen. Strelitzia is trying on a very floaty, shocking pink outfit. Strelitzia has been invited to a party. It's very natural for Strelitzia to make a big fuss about dressing...*

Strelitzia: "I'm sooo worried, Pro dear! I don't know if I should wear this dress to the party... D'you think I'd look better in my orange jumpsuit? The one with the utility belt?"

Protea: "Huh? Oh no, Strelly, dear, you look lovely in that outfit! It's such a merry shade of pink. Pink suits you, you know!"

Rowena: (smirking) "Yeah, that pink does. It's too bright for it's own good!"

Protea: "Seal your beak, Rowena!"

Strelitzia: (not hearing) "But, I don't know what type of party this is going to be! I might look ridiculous in a ball dress, and ev'ryone else is in jeans and jumpers!"

Rowena: (mildly) "Well, Strella, you look ridiculous without trying-- OW!"

*Protea pecks Rowena hard*

Protea: "Wear the slinky black dress, then... Then it won't look too out-of-place if it is a casual party. You'll just look... Like a rich rooster's daughter. Ok, Strelitzia?"

Strelitzia: (clicking her beak anxiously) "Well, ok then! I think I'll be fine. Lin and her dad will be here with to pick me up soon. I hope they serve shoe-polish flavored jelly at the party. It's my fave!"

Protea: (happily) "I'm so glad someone likes my cooking! Rowena, it was very expensive shoe-polish, you know..."

Rowena: (sticks out her tongue) "Yuck."

*they hear a Lin and her dad arriving outside the coop*

Lin: "Strel? Streliiiiiiiiitzia!"

Strelitzia: "Oh oh, gotta go-- bye Pro, by Ro-Ro!"

Rowena: (frowning) "Ro-Ro? What happened to Cherryflutters?!"


End of chapter.



Dear Reader, This may be the second-last chapter in Those Crazy Chickens! Book One: Monday ! I may not be able to write the Mystery Story this month. I am running out of ideas. If you have any ideas for a special story, let me know in the comments. But I may get time to write the Mystery Story some other time. Even if I don't, there's still Those Crazy Chickens! Book Two: Tuesday to look forward to! Stick around for the final chapter of Book One: Monday ~ Helen


Wednesday, 13 January 2016

Those Crazy Chickens! Book One: Monday Chapter 6

Back In The Old Days With Sandra Bigg
Rowena's best friend from the bird pet shop was a large blonde hen called Sandra Bigg. Sandra was bought as a pet about a week after Rowena.


*Setting: Sandra and Rowena are eating at the pipe-feeder back at the pet bird shop.*

Rowena: "So, I heard you're getting some humans this June?"

Sandra: "Yeah, I am."

Rowena: "What type?"

Sandra: "Portuguese blondies."

Rowena: "Awesome!"

Sandra: "Yeah... And are you getting some pet humans, too?"

Rowena: "Uh huh. I'm getting the local South African breed, you know... Coloured ones... Dark haired."

Sandra: "Oh ok! Nice!"

Rowena: "I must warn you, dear, humans are a big responsibility..."

Sandra: (sigh) "I know! I think I'm up to it, though."

Rowena: "Here's tip, old girl: lay 200 eggs a year only! And if the food your humans produce for you isn't great, use your pocket money to buy some junk food. Junk food is good for you, dear, so cut down on veggies a bit, ok? You'll be in great shape eating junk food and only a teeeeny amount of veg each week. And don't drink any water that has apple cider vinegar in it. Drink mango milkshake instead."

Sandra: "I will! This diet sounds great."


(Pause)


Rowena: "So, how big will your flock of humans be?"

Sandra: "A family of four, I think."

Rowena: "Who's the main owner?"

Sandra: "The mom, I think. But the two kids seemed pretty excited about me, too."

Rowena: "Good luck with your humans, Sandy! Hope you can manage them."

Sandra: "Thanks, Rowena. And thanks for all your advice!"

Rowena: "Oh, darling, I'm an expert on human care. Gotta go now -- bye!"

Sandra: "See ya!"

Both leave the scene.


End of chapter.

Wednesday, 6 January 2016

Rowena Of Instagram

Remember Rowena? The little red hen? Here she is:


Cute little bossy hen!
Photo by Helen IV



I got this surprisingly not blurry photo of her earlier this week. I haven't told you that she has an Instagram account... Well, she does anyway. You can find this photo of her on Rowena's Instagram
She has already  posted over 20 pictures and she has 30 followers!

I just thought I'd mention it, in case you have an Instagram account and want to see more photos of my chickens. Oh, and Protea and Strelitzia have an account, too.


I'm sorry I haven't really been active much on this blog. If you enjoyed my Those Crazy Chickens! Series , and want to read more, I am working on another chapter plus a spooky mystery story about Ro Pro and Strel to make up for not posting enough. But The Mystery Story will take some time. Give me about 11-12 days to compete part 1 of it. Yes, I'll be posting the Story in 2 parts. Stopping at a cliffhanger, perhaps...

I'm working on it, OK?!

Helen